the only mp you can trust

Boy am I having one of those today, and it's put me in a really shitty mood. Not just shitty, but so bad that it would be a really bad idea to be around me because I'll probably rip your face off and then feed it to you kinda bad.

Jesus, and it all started from a fucking leaky washing machine feed. After a year of doing its job just fine, it starting leaking a few days ago. Getting the machine out was a bitch because it's tightly wedged in, and in a corner to boot. So my working space is minimal and really dark.

It's amazing how things change over what seems to be quite a brief period. The thing I was thinking about was the Americanisation (or should that be Americanization) of Britain and our language.

Just this afternoon while I was out walking the dog, a delivery van drove past at high speed, almost running the dog over. I instinctively flipped him the bird and called him a Fucking Douche.

I just came back from my local Co-op supermarket, and I'm still not sure what just happened, happened. I only needed a few things, so I wandered round, chucked everything in the basket and went to the checkout.

Now my local Co-op is always a bit weird with their checkouts, as in they have several but no more than two are ever open at the same time. I chose the one with the shortest line and proceeded to put my things on the conveyer, I even remembered to put the little "next customer" bar down.

I was driving today and within my 45 minute journey I noticed something disturbing. You know some car accessory stores sell those kits I can only describe as fucked up - they consist of a pink furry steering wheel cover, seatbelt pad, headrest covers and other weirdness usually including stuff that dangles from the rear view mirror.

Thanks to Dad for this one. Apparently this happened last winter in Denmark when they had hurricane force winds. Pretty scary stuff!

A few days ago I answered the door to a delivery guy who had been trying to deliver a package to one of my neighbours. He asked if I could sign for it and I said okay. When he asked my surname I told him and spelled it out for him, as most people spell it wrong. It's not difficult to understand P-O-L-L-E-Y, but this guy totally got the wrong idea - either that or he really wanted me to kick his arse.

When he handed me the electronic signing thing for my signature, he'd put my name down as Mr Poopy. I looked at him and said "you're kidding, right?"

I'm not feeling much like posting today, so I thought I'd leave you a nice music video instead.

If it wasn't bad enough that iTunes only lets you buy songs from your country of residence (if you're lucky enough to be able to access it at all), now Youtube seems to be at it as well.

I thought the idea of Youtube was that you can watch any video from anywhere. I subscribed to Linkin Park tv today, and managed to watch a few documentary style vids, but when it came to selecting the song Bleed It Out I got a message saying the video is unavailable in my country. What the fuck?

Ah well, torrents it is then.

In the news recently was an article about how many pedestrians are getting injured as a result of being hit by hybrid vehicles, which as we know are virtually silent at low speeds. I myself was nearly run down by a Lexus RX400h, purely my fault as I started to cross the road without looking properly (and in the dark - shame on me).

Anyway, Lotus say they have come up with a solution, which they showed the media. Basically they have installed two large speakers behind the grill of a Toyota Prius, and as the car accelerates the speakers pump out engine noises.